Gas & The Pope Mobile
The average price of 87 octane gas at an EXXON station hovers around $3.45 per gallon.
Exxon’s 2007 profit was a record setting $40 BILLION!!! That’s right 40 BILLION DOLLARS!!!!!
Exxon CEO Rex Tillerson’s salary was a total of $21.7 MILLION – this included an 18% raise (don’t worry – YOU will NEVER receive that $hit where you work). His base salary was $1.8 million (before the raise), $3.4 million bonus (even my blind coworkers can see that $hit will never happen here), and approximately $16.1 million in stock options. He also received nearly $500, 000.00 in “other compensation” which include nearly $230,000 in personal security costs (yeah he need that $hit cause somebody like me who can’t fill up my lil putt putt might catch that nucca slipping & shank his @ss!) But I suppose someone somewhere feels he deserved that $hit, after all his company did post a record setting profit of $40 billion.
Some of you may not understand the term ‘profit’. For your benefit I am including a definition below:
Profit – the positive gain from an investment or business operation AFTER subtracting for all expenses. Opposite of loss
In applying this to yourself, think of your paycheck after the government subtracts its’ share. Subtract lunch money, child care – if you have any crumb snatchers -, work clothing (some of you may subtract less since club clothes double as work attire), and last but not least GAS to get to and fro. Now what was YOUR profit?
I know you are sitting there with your mouths open thinking HOW IN THE HELL did these folks make all this money, when the Arabs said they wasn’t making no more damn oil available. All the Iraqi oil is on fire and the U.S. does not have enough oil in reserves- so THEY say. I can tell you how in the hell. People we have been BAMBOOZLED!!! HOODWINKED!!!! DAVID COPPERFIELDED (these people are master illusionist)! Just plain old fashioned LIED TO!!!
The average American can barely make it to work on a daily basis due to the rising costs of fuel. Hell I was bout to stand on the corner with some House of Prayers sweet potato pies my damn self just to put some petro in the go mobile.
Yep the Oil companies and Government Contractors (especially Defense) are just raking in the dough. Meanwhile Sister Soulja & Princess Flower Girl are writing home from the war begging for toilet tissue. Something just ain’t right. One friend of mine had to break the bank – literally crack her piggy bank she’s had since 1998 and shake coins for gas, bread, water, milk etc – everything has gone up cause it costs more to transport goods to market. This troubled me a great deal!!!
I decided to contact Exxon in an attempt to gain some understanding of this. Of course the receptionist hung up on me several times & threatened to call the Po Po on my black @ss. Needless to say I didn’t call back.
So I figured since His Majesty the Pope was in town I would ask him for some help & gas money. I had a plan all worked out. A certain person of Bahamian descent – whom shall remain nameless – was supposed to call me as soon as she saw the Pope Mobile (by the way that $hit is nice. I bet you see somebody in Decatur hooking they ride up like that. You know Nigras). With her EYE view vantage point from Connecticut Ave it should have been a slam dunk right …well. Like I have said a many of times before – Nigras!!!
It seems she who shall remain nameless, got so excited when the Pope passed by, passed her black @ss out!!! Note to self. Never get a show stopping drama queen who has frequent bouts of heart palpitations to call you about anything important. So of course because Pensionetta (her new middle name) didn’t call me on time, the Pope Mobile passed me by. I tried to run and catch it, but after falling over two crying YT people & some dancing chicos, only ended up scraping my knee caps & elbows.
Never fear, Ms G always got a plan B. I made my way down to Pookies emporium to get a ticket for Mass the next day at the stadium. I pulled out some old Rosary beads I got from a crack head for $2 – I always knew they would come in handy – and headed for Nationals Stadium.
Security was TIGHT up in that joint. You would have sworn Be-Yawn-Say nem was up in that piece. I made my way to the front, grabbed a chair till the Pope came out. I was real inconspicuous and would’ve been able to sneak onstage if it wasn't for all that knee bending & standing & praying & kneeling and all that other stuff them Catholic peoples do. $hit I was tired and had to sit down. Well of course security spotted my ass sitting down trying to sneak my water bottle and ham sandwich out my bag. Needless to say I DID not get to see the Pope and I am currently writing this blog from a ‘secure’ DC Correctional Facility.
Exxon’s 2007 profit was a record setting $40 BILLION!!! That’s right 40 BILLION DOLLARS!!!!!
Exxon CEO Rex Tillerson’s salary was a total of $21.7 MILLION – this included an 18% raise (don’t worry – YOU will NEVER receive that $hit where you work). His base salary was $1.8 million (before the raise), $3.4 million bonus (even my blind coworkers can see that $hit will never happen here), and approximately $16.1 million in stock options. He also received nearly $500, 000.00 in “other compensation” which include nearly $230,000 in personal security costs (yeah he need that $hit cause somebody like me who can’t fill up my lil putt putt might catch that nucca slipping & shank his @ss!) But I suppose someone somewhere feels he deserved that $hit, after all his company did post a record setting profit of $40 billion.
Some of you may not understand the term ‘profit’. For your benefit I am including a definition below:
Profit – the positive gain from an investment or business operation AFTER subtracting for all expenses. Opposite of loss
In applying this to yourself, think of your paycheck after the government subtracts its’ share. Subtract lunch money, child care – if you have any crumb snatchers -, work clothing (some of you may subtract less since club clothes double as work attire), and last but not least GAS to get to and fro. Now what was YOUR profit?
I know you are sitting there with your mouths open thinking HOW IN THE HELL did these folks make all this money, when the Arabs said they wasn’t making no more damn oil available. All the Iraqi oil is on fire and the U.S. does not have enough oil in reserves- so THEY say. I can tell you how in the hell. People we have been BAMBOOZLED!!! HOODWINKED!!!! DAVID COPPERFIELDED (these people are master illusionist)! Just plain old fashioned LIED TO!!!
The average American can barely make it to work on a daily basis due to the rising costs of fuel. Hell I was bout to stand on the corner with some House of Prayers sweet potato pies my damn self just to put some petro in the go mobile.
Yep the Oil companies and Government Contractors (especially Defense) are just raking in the dough. Meanwhile Sister Soulja & Princess Flower Girl are writing home from the war begging for toilet tissue. Something just ain’t right. One friend of mine had to break the bank – literally crack her piggy bank she’s had since 1998 and shake coins for gas, bread, water, milk etc – everything has gone up cause it costs more to transport goods to market. This troubled me a great deal!!!
I decided to contact Exxon in an attempt to gain some understanding of this. Of course the receptionist hung up on me several times & threatened to call the Po Po on my black @ss. Needless to say I didn’t call back.
So I figured since His Majesty the Pope was in town I would ask him for some help & gas money. I had a plan all worked out. A certain person of Bahamian descent – whom shall remain nameless – was supposed to call me as soon as she saw the Pope Mobile (by the way that $hit is nice. I bet you see somebody in Decatur hooking they ride up like that. You know Nigras). With her EYE view vantage point from Connecticut Ave it should have been a slam dunk right …well. Like I have said a many of times before – Nigras!!!
It seems she who shall remain nameless, got so excited when the Pope passed by, passed her black @ss out!!! Note to self. Never get a show stopping drama queen who has frequent bouts of heart palpitations to call you about anything important. So of course because Pensionetta (her new middle name) didn’t call me on time, the Pope Mobile passed me by. I tried to run and catch it, but after falling over two crying YT people & some dancing chicos, only ended up scraping my knee caps & elbows.
Never fear, Ms G always got a plan B. I made my way down to Pookies emporium to get a ticket for Mass the next day at the stadium. I pulled out some old Rosary beads I got from a crack head for $2 – I always knew they would come in handy – and headed for Nationals Stadium.
Security was TIGHT up in that joint. You would have sworn Be-Yawn-Say nem was up in that piece. I made my way to the front, grabbed a chair till the Pope came out. I was real inconspicuous and would’ve been able to sneak onstage if it wasn't for all that knee bending & standing & praying & kneeling and all that other stuff them Catholic peoples do. $hit I was tired and had to sit down. Well of course security spotted my ass sitting down trying to sneak my water bottle and ham sandwich out my bag. Needless to say I DID not get to see the Pope and I am currently writing this blog from a ‘secure’ DC Correctional Facility.
posted by Ms G @ 4:16 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home